QUOTES OF THE DAY: COMEDIANS VS. HECKLERS

WARNING: THIS JOURNAL ENTRY CONTAINS ADULT HUMOUR

DANIELLE WARD: "If I wanted to talk to a w**ker, I'd call your dad... and get him to put your mum on the phone."

HECKLER: "How's your momma?"
RICHARD PRYOR: "How's my momma? I beg your pardon. I will slap you in the face with my d*ck."

JIMMY CARR: "Hey, I don't come to where you work and knock the sailor's c**ks out of your mouth."

RODNEY DANGERFIELD: "Hey, buddy, you oughta save your breath. You'll need it later to blow up your inflatable date."

JO BRAND: "Where's your girlfriend? Outside grazing, I presume?"

RUSSELL KANE: "You're confident, aren't you? So confident you seem like the sort of woman who would Rohypnol her own drink."

STEVE MARTIN: "I remember when I had my first beer.